Inspired by Stargate: Atlantis
By N.K. Murdock
“Ha! Got another one!” A loud shout from behind her caused Teyla to turn and make her way back into the house. John Sheppard and Ronon Dex were standing around a pool table in the large, airy living room, and John was holding both hands around the pool cue resting along the back of his neck, grinning triumphantly at his opponent. “You do realize I only need to sink two more before I win, right?” he taunted playfully.
Ronon glared at him for a moment before moving into position to take his shot. John continued to grin as he reached out and grabbed the beer bottle sitting on the edge of the table, taking a long drink.
Ronon lined up his shot and easily sunk the striped ball into the pocket. He smirked and lifted his eyes to John. “Your turn. Don’t choke now.”
John rolled his eyes and sauntered around the table. He placed his bottle back on the table, and leaned over to take his shot. The ball ended up hitting the corner of the pocket, and bouncing away instead of rolling into it. “Gaaaaah!” John complained as Teyla gave a small laugh at his antics. He threw another smile her way and took another swig of his beer, thinking deeply as Ronon took his shot, and sunk his next ball.
“You need to make your ‘games’ a little better. What does pool teach anyone? It’s not useful at all.” Ronon said as he leaned on his pool cue.
John moved into position to take his next shot. “It’s all about angles. Not everything has to be about strength. Brains are just as important.” he said, as he sunk his next ball. As it sank into the pocket, he suddenly looked up at both of them with an almost nervous gaze. “Hey, you guys are happy here, right?”
Teyla blinked at the sudden subject change. “Of course we are. I do find myself missing Kanaan and Torren, but that cannot be helped.” Her eyes had darkened slightly at the mention of her family, but she gave him a reassuring smile. “I enjoy living with you. And Ronon,” she added, almost as an afterthought as she nodded towards the tall Satedan. “You have given me a freedom I never had back home. I can actually…relax…and be myself.” Except there is no one here to fight, or to protect. And back home…the war never ends. She didn’t voice this thought aloud. She didn’t know how she felt about it.
Ronon looked back at John. “We’re doing just fine. Teyla makes a good point, we’re free here. Although I don’t like the thought of the Wraith being left alone in Pegasus. And sometimes…playing pool gets boring.” He shot Teyla a look that suggested he understood her unspoken words more than she knew, and took a seat in one of the thick armchairs, balancing his pool cue against his shoulder. “Nobody seems to care that the Wraith could be on their way here again. Thinking they’ve given up is naive.”
The group sat in contemplative silence. Teyla had taken a few more steps into the room, and had ended up perched on the edge of the pool table. John took another sip of his drink, before the ringing of a telephone startled all three out of their reverie. He moved into the kitchen, looked at the caller id. It was a DC area code.
John furrowed his brow before he answered, and before he could get a word out, he flinched and jerked the phone away from his ear. Teyla and Ronon looked at him curiously as he held the phone at arm’s length, before he put it on speaker. “ – believe it! I thought I had done something wrong, screwed up a calculation somewhere, but then I realized I wouldn’t have made that large of an error, if one at all.” The voice was unmistakeable.
“Rodney – “ John interrupted, but the excited man kept on talking.
“So I get here, and managed to narrow down the location to a specific building. I zipped over there and found the office it was in…”
“Rodney!”
“…but then I got arrested! They said I was speeding and that I resisted arrest. How could I have resisted being arrested until I WAS being arrested? It doesn’t make any sense at all. Why can’t you guys have clear-cut laws like we do in Canada? Do your cops need to fill a quota or something? Honestly I was barely speeding, it shouldn’t have even counted as speeding, which means they shouldn’t have any reason to arrest me, so I can’t resist the arrest!” John sighed tiredly as Rodney continued on. “I saw it, Sheppard! I really saw it! A ZedPM! Then they dragged me away and drove me here and told me I had one phone call, but I didn’t know who to call so – “
“Rodney!!” John tried once more, the mention of a ZPM catching his attention in the middle of Rodney’s rant.
Rodney still carried on, his voice cracking not only with excitement but near-hysteria. “I mean I guess I could have called Jeannie but they’re all on vacation in California right now. Something about going to Disneyland. Or is it Disney world? I can never keep the two straight. I’ve never been to either.”
John clenched his teeth, before tossing the phone across the room to Ronon, who barked “McKAY!” loud enough to startle the scientist into silence. He then tossed the phone back to John, smirking slightly.
“Where are you?” John asked.
“DC. They arrested me! Weren’t you listening to a word I said?” Rodney snapped. John heard an authoritative voice say, “Okay, that’s enough,” in the background, and Rodney frantically said: “No-no-no-no-no just one minute, one more minute.”
“Rodney, sit tight, I’ll come and get you. Which station are you at?”
“Sheppard!” Rodney’s voice cracked again, “I think I’m in real trouble here. I mean, this is a jail they’re going to put me in….” His voice faded. “No wait, no wa–” and the line went dead. John stared at it for a moment before hanging it up and turning to Teyla and Ronon.
“So…DC? I’ve never been there before,” Ronon said.
John nodded once before moving to grab his coat. Teyla and Ronon hurried after, snatching theirs off the rack, and the three left the beautiful house to go rescue their wayward friend.
~*~
The waiting room of the 2nd Precinct was spartan, pale yellow, colored by overhead fluorescent light. The bright DC dawn pouring through the wall of windows behind them tried to warm the chilly atmosphere, but with little success. The cracked plastic blue chairs creaked as John, Teyla, and Ronon settled into them, but the tough-looking officer behind the bulletproof glass on the other side of the room made no move. Teyla and Ronon took in their surroundings with curious, wary eyes, but John just glared at the barred door blocking their path to his friend. He found himself wondering how long they would have to wait. The most he had been able to discern from the officer while paying the bail was that Rodney had been arrested for evading police, which John had found ridiculous. Rodney was a careful driver, only prone to speeding when he was panicked or highly emotional which – admittedly – was a lot of the time. But outright running from the police? Rodney wasn’t stupid.
Regardless, here they were. John had paid the bail to keep his friend out of the court system and jail and ideally a followup from the U.S. Military would clear Rodney’s record. Oh yes, John would be letting the military know about this. Rodney had said: “ZPM.” The implications of that word were too huge to just keep quiet, and if Rodney had found one…John shook himself, trying to straighten out his mind. He was torn between curiosity and frustration and genuine concern. Rodney had a hell of a bark, but his bite was pretty bumbling. And sure he’d been locked in a Wraith prison before, but there was a difference between certain death and living hell.
He’d only been in for one night though. How bad could he really be?
“So, what is this place?” Ronon rumbled.
“It’s a detention facility,” John replied. “It’s where they hold prisoners for bail before going to court.”
“Rodney is a prisoner?” Teyla asked, alarm coloring her voice.
“Do we need to break him out?” Ronon looked at the officer behind the glass. “It’s just one guard. We can take him easily.”
“No, no,” John shook his head. “No, he actually did something wrong. I already paid the bail, now we’re just waiting for him to come out.”
“You pay to have your prisoners released?” Now Ronon sounded surprised.
“Isn’t that bribery?” Teyla added.
“Well no, not really. I mean, if they’re in jail then yes. But before they go there they get the option of paying usually a pretty big sum of money. Ideally, most people don’t want to go to jail.” John shrugged. “It’s all very political, but we don’t like to put people in jail that don’t really deserve it. Jails cost a lot to maintain and they get crowded easily.”
“What do you mean, ‘maintain’?” Ronon pressed. “They’re filled with criminals, right? Just keep ‘em fed and guarded. They don’t need anything else.”
The door opened then, thankfully saving John from the sticky situation of describing the penal system in further detail. A uniformed officer walked out first, followed by a shuffling Rodney. He didn’t look hurt, but he did look an absolute mess. His skin was pasty white and shining with sweat, and his grey shirt had long, deep stains on it. His shoulders were slumped and his face aimed at the ground. He was silent, which alarmed John more than he wanted to admit. Rodney had been pretty frantic on the phone. He’d expected the scientist to come out swearing or shouting – not subdued.
Rodney looked up at him then, and his face changed, washing over with relief. John watched his eyes go from neutral to joy and then to growing panic. Nope, he’d been right. They didn’t have much time at all. He quickly reached forward and took the clipboard from the officer, signing it hurriedly, authorizing he had paid the bail and could receive Rodney. The officer nodded and stepped out of the way so Rodney could pass. He did so, coming straight John, and Teyla and Ronon instantly flanked him. John stepped to the side and opened the door, allowing Rodney to get out of there first.
“I’m a dead man,” Rodney said the moment he hit the humid DC morning.
John put a hand on his shoulder and moved him to the car. He could smell him now, the rancid odor of urine and panic and sweat stinging at his nose and eyes. As much as it made him cringe to do so, he shoved Rodney into the car, ignoring the stutters as the man tried to start several sentences and failed. Ronon and Teyla got in the backseat, Ronon casting John a significant look. John nodded. He didn’t like the plan that was about to unfold, but he knew they would have no choice.
The moment he started the car, Rodney finally got himself together. His body was on autopilot, clicking his seat belt, but he started talking. “I’m in the system. I’m ruined. No one takes convicts seriously. Oh my God. Oh my God, I’m a convict.” His voice cracked as John pulled out of the parking lot, and his eyes continued to widen frenetically. “I have a record!”
“Rodney,” John tried to stop him but there was no use.
“I can’t believe the state of those places!” Rodney changed tack instantly. “We pour so much money into them and there wasn’t a decent place to sit, let alone lie down. I didn’t get a wink of sleep all night. What took you so long? You were two hours behind me in Colorado! What took you so long to get here!?” His voice was climbing in pitch and volume and John added a little boost of speed along the highway, looking for the exit.
“Commercial airlines don’t exactly fly at midnight,” he tried.
“So? You could have had Caldwell beam you up to the Daedalus and down into DC! They’re orbiting Earth right now!”
“Yes, because he’s a transportation service,” John rolled his eyes, but Rodney missed the sarcasm.
“Don’t even get me started on my cellmates. God, I had cellmates. I was in the lockdown. And they were staring at me like I was….like I was….”
“You’re not that attractive, Rodney,” John cut him off.
It was a mark of how upset Rodney was that he completely ignored John’s statement, and continued babbling all the way to the restaurant. John glanced in the rearview a few times, noting Teyla’s patient face smiling back and Ronon’s steadily mounting frustration. This was going to be a tense breakfast. He knew it was probably best that they got Rodney someplace where he didn’t smell like a latrine, but there would be no calming the man down until he got food in his stomach.
“…and the food there! If you can call it food, hardtack and swill, all of it. Disgusting, no flavor, not even a Powerbar. You’d think they would understand the necessity of taste. Of course, they’re convicts, they don’t understand anything. I shouldn’t have been there. I can’t be a convict. It’s not like I even did anything wrong.” The four got out of the car and headed inside, John signaling the hostess to seat them near the back. She must have gotten a whiff of Rodney or manage to understand some of what he was saying, because she nodded hurriedly and led them to the back, leaving them with menus, four waters with lemon, (that John moved calmly away from Rodney), and a concerned face.
“I wasn’t running from them on purpose! I thought they were chasing an axe murderer! Or a money thief. Or…someone else who did bad things. I’m not a bad person. I mean, sure, I’m petty, arrogant, and bad with people, but none of that is an arrestable offense…”
“McKAY!” Ronon exploded, causing many people nearby to jump. Teyla quickly touched his shoulder and looked apologetically around at everyone. Rodney, for his part, stopped talking entirely, nearly diving under the table in adrenaline.
“What? What?”
“It is all right,” Teyla spoke up, her low and husky voice soothing those around her. It had a visible effect on Rodney, who began to calm immediately. “You are safe now,” she added with a gentle smile.
The waitress returned to take their orders, and John stopped Rodney from getting a coffee, pretty sure that the added caffeine would destroy any chance of coherent words from him for the rest of the day. After ordering their food and sending the woman on her way, John fixed the scientist with another stare. “All right, McKay,” he said softly. “Why did you get arrested over a ZPM?”
Rodney jumped, knocking over John’s water. “Are you crazy?” he asked as John scurried to clean it up, Ronon and Teyla tossing in their napkins to help. “What are you doing talking about that in a public location?”
“You’re the one who shouted it in the middle of a crowded police station!” John shot back, mopping up the water.
“Yes, well, I was about to be hauled off to jail…oh wait. I WAS hauled off to jail! I had every right to yell what could have been my last words!”
“McKay,..” John began warningly.
“All right!” Rodney took in a deep breath and looked each of them in the eye. Slowly, the panic faded, replaced with a tangible, quivering excitement. Leaning in, he said earnestly: “I found a ZedPM.”
Teyla’s and Ronon’s eyes widened in shock, and John leaned in to match Rodney. “Where?”
“Some crazy, big-name business corporation got their hands on one and have been flaunting it for years…”
“How could they have been flaunting it?” John interjected. “We never knew they had it.”
“Oh, they were flaunting it. It was just sitting there on a lab table hooked up to all these machines, out in the open for anyone to just walk in and see…”
“So how did you find it?” Ronon pushed on.
“Well, that’s the really cool part.” Rodney sat back for a moment, deliberately creating suspense as the waitress returned and plunked down a lemon-less water in front of him. He took a long drink and sighed happily. “Fresh water. Never thought I would taste that again.”
Ronon growled quietly. Rodney hurried up. “I-I-I was sitting in my lab at Area 51, monitoring readings for a project none of you are important enough to know about and suddenly out of nowhere there comes this huge power spoke all over the screen! So I put my hand up to call Zele…my assistant…and of course there was no one there because I’m not on Atlantis and we don’t have the ear thingys and….well anyway I played back the readings and sure enough there was a spike on the subspace frequency consistent with a ZedPM!”
“You monitor subspace at Area 51?” John asked.
“Yes but you’re not supposed to know that and I didn’t tell you. The point is that I saw the spike and once I realized it was a ZedPM I decided to go check it out.”
“And get arrested.”
“Well no, I didn’t decide to get arrested, but that wasn’t my fault anyway…”
“So we can go home.”
The sentence came from Teyla, landing on the table with an almost audible thud. Ronon cast a look at the woman, who was looking wide-eyed and expectantly at Rodney. She moved her eyes to John next, and the sudden hope in them stabbed at his chest. He blinked in confusion, not expecting this reaction, and looked away from her.
Rodney was nodding. “With a fully operational ZedPM, we could open a wormhole to the Pegasus Galaxy and send you and Ronon through if you wanted to check up on your people. But more than that…we could return Atlantis there. We could return Atlantis there and keep exploring and still have enough power to make trips to Earth.” The earlier flicker of excitement grew. “We can go back. And we can stay there.”
Fiendish Fan Fiction 